Video Corner...
Softball Blooper - Catcher Throws at Batter's Head
It Won't Work
A husband and wife went to a counselor after 15 years of marriage.
The counselor asks them what the problem is and the wife goes into a tirade listing every problem they have ever had in the 15 years they've been married.
She goes on and on and on.
Finally, the counselor gets up, walks around the desk, embraces the wife and kisses her passionately. The woman shuts up and sits quietly in a daze. The counselor turns to the husband and says, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?"
The husband thinks for a moment and replies: "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays,
but on Tuesdays and most Thursdays, I've got high school softball."
You know you're a softball junkie if ...
You need a second job just to pay for gloves, bats, equipment, uniforms, player fees, batting cages, etc. ...
Your second job is umpiring at softball games.
Your idea of spending quality time with your spouse is playing on the same co-ed team.
You have more than one bat that cost over $200.
You play three nights a week and you are considering joining a tournament team for the weekends.
It's a known fact to several managers that when they need a player ... it's OK to call you at 2 a.m. the night before a tournament, because if you’re not already playing you'll want to.
You go to the softball fields on nights your team isn't even playing.
You used to rest and relax on the weekends, now the only rest you get is between games at a tournament.
You think "wearing something nice" means an all-tournament shirt with no dirt stains.
Your softball cleats get more use than any other pair of shoes you own.
When someone says they are going to the hills this weekend, you ask if there is a tournament in Austin.
All your white socks have dirt stains from playing softball.
Your idea of a weekend getaway is a two-day tournament in San Marcos.
You have a tattoo that says “Softball Forever”.
You plan your vacation each year to ASA Nationals.
You own more softball t-shirts than pairs of underwear.
Your dogs are named Anderson, Easton and Rawlings.
When you log onto the Internet, the first page/site you go to is a softball message/discussion board.
Your boyfriend knows when you ask them out to dinner you really mean pizza after the game.
When your boyfriend gives you an ultimatum, either softball or him ... and your first thought is how much you’re going to miss him.
You tape your bat handles with various designs and use only tape with team colors or that match your bat colors.
When someone tells you that every sentence you say has something to do with softball and your reply is..."you’re way off base."
You have a softball website.
When your team goes 0-2 in a tourney and is done by noon, you are still hanging out at the park at 8 p.m.
You get married on home plate.
Softball Riddles
1. Why does it take longer to run from 2B to 3B than it does to run from 1B to 2B?
Answer: There's a Shortstop between 2B and 3B.
2. What goes all the way around a softball field but never moves?
Answer: The fence.
An Umpire’s View Of Softball
How many softball players does it take to screw in a light bulb? None! They are too busy complaining about the last call.
What is the difference between a softball player and a puppy? A puppy will eventually stop whining!
What do you call a basement full of softball players? A whine cellar.
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